Back At It

We had a tremendous vacation in Europe over the holidays and into February. Even with COVID hanging over our fun, we managed to see friends in Berlin and Cordoba. I'm hoping travel will return to pre-pandemic normalcy someday; I'm willing to take a few chances until then.

Back at my writing table, I've edited Bits & Masterpieces again, and sent it out to four new agents in hopes of reeling in some interest. I got a rejection in less than 18 hours. Wow, that smarts a bit.

I found a new Instagramer to follow - it's daily art, and I've identified at least three new targets for short stories. It's funny...writers pour every last ounce of self-respect into their work, fashion and refashion it, show it off for approval, get shot down, and, yet, continue to try and put it out there. Compulsion? Boredom? Insanity? Why, yes, that's it!

I DO consider myself a writer, I write almost every day. I've had a couple of business articles and a magazine piece published. I've written a novel and a collection of short stories. I've known great excitement over a single sentence and extraordinary depression over a single rejection. And yet, here we are.

I'm gonna skooch up my chair, through back my shoulders, and open a new document...just because I can.

Rejection is Hard

There's a risk anytime you put yourself out there. Whether it's voicing your opinion about that 20-year old shirt your husband just put on AGAIN or submitting your manuscript (which you're certain is the best thing since "To Kill a Mockingbird"), there's always the possibility you'll get shot down.

I got four rejection letters this past week; it was a bit of a gut punch. It's hard to take, mostly because I know it's back to the drawing board for more research to find that perfect match, and, bottom line, I'm really lazy.

I decided to rewrite my query letter, and I could feel the snark and resentfulness flowing through my fingers in the typing of it. Sigh. It's not the agents' fault. 

But I'm going to use it - hopefully it will come off funny and be an eye-catcher to get to the next level - someone actually reading my stuff. 

So now I'm on the trail for the next half-dozen targets. Wish me luck.

Looking for Affirmation

 If you know me, you know that I'm an extrovert. I'm pretty out-spoken, strive to be witty, love to be in charge, a bit of a control freak...all the usual characteristics. 

The worst thing about being an extrovert is not getting applause for everything I do. My Christmas packages are perfect. My charcuterie boards are perfect. My beer label placement on our beer fridge is perfect. And I want everyone to admire my efforts. Egomaniac? Nah, I like attention, but I don't crave it and I'm not arrogant about it. Narcissist? Not really, I don't weaponize friendships to get a pat on the back and I don't destroy those who might overlook what I've accomplish. I'm just looking for affirmation. 

Working on a book for more than a year - pouring your soul into it, squeezing words out of your head and onto a page, willing jokes to be gettable and funny, hoping your grammar and structure skills would make your English teachers proud- then having the guts to send it out into the universe requires giant, brass balls. Waiting for anyone to raise an eyebrow and show some interest is excruciating. 

I've sent out queries, and I'm waiting for responses. So far, none. No rejections yet, but also no applause. I'm just looking for affirmation.

Searching for an Agent

 So I've finished Bits & Masterpieces. Well, do writers ever really finish? 

I've got 20 short stories and have edited them about five times...so far. Each time, there's something new or something else that catches my eye. I have ideas in my sleep, in the shower, on the toilet, while cooking, while watching "Schitt's Creek" (which, if you haven't already, you should totally watch).

And if writing the stories wasn't hard enough, now I'm on the hunt for an agent who will think they are the greatest thing ever. Sifting through hundreds of names and agencies is time consuming and a little disheartening. There are soooo many. Will I ever find one that ticks all the boxes? How many rejections will I have to endure? What if no one likes the thing that I've poured my soul into and am so proud of? Sigh.

In the meantime, I'm hoping to grow my social media presence, so when an agent does like my work and askes me if I have a demonstrable platform, I can say, "Well, sure...I'm working on one."

a new start

I've always had a thing for words. I mean, I'm not a linguist or a spelling bee champion; I love them for what they can do - make us laugh, cry, ponder, fume. Yeah, I'm stating the obvious, but hear me out! 

When I was a goofy kid in elementary school, my class was assigned an art project: draw something that the song "America the Beautiful" describes. I drew an airplane covered in fruit. It made my parents laugh. I knew I had something; I knew words had something. When my best friend's kid was about six, we were standing in line at a burger joint perusing the menu. I asked him if he wanted a shake. He nodded yes, so I grabbed his shoulders and shook him. His eyes widened as he realized the double entendre, peals of laughter issued from this snaggle-toothed mouth, and he turned to his mom to make sure she got the joke (she ALWAYS gets my jokes). I think that was his word revelation moment. And now, whenever I'm writing and I conjure the perfect word, my inner cheerleader rah-rahs, and I give myself a little high-five.

Speaking of writing, this new blog is my salvo toward finalizng my new book: Bits & Masterpieces. 

In the last year or so I've been working on a series of short stories and verses that reimagine the backstory of the world's greatest art. B&MP has absolutely nothing to do with the artist's inspiration. It isn't remotely concerned with technique, method, or mental state. Art lovers will totally hate it or completely love it. I'll keep you posted. 

I'm trying hard not to kid myself - I still have a bit of work to do on it, but organizing a social media platform around it puts a little pressure on me to finish...at least I hope it does.